MADNESS

It really sucks !! The TOEFL thing hit me bad - who knew I have to juggle with this thing at the last moment. I presumed that I can waive my TOEFL for most of the schools but Berkeley really demoralized me. I have to call Berkeley and Michigan tomorrow to verify if I can waive my TOEFL scores. If not - to hell with TOEFL - not only I have to shelf an extra 130 bucks but also put in some efforts to make sure that I don't screw it - over that an extra 3 hours gone from my precious appin' time. Anyway I lost the evening thinking about - I hardly could concentrate on my Michigan Cover Letter. I am thinking of taking Thursday off and concentrating on the rest of the stuff I have to finish before the weekend. Maybe I will attend the Michigan reception in the evening. I am really curious to talk to the Michigan adcomms this Thursday - hope I will get some last minute tips.

MBA appin' process is really a drain on you - emotionally and physically. One day you spent hours regurgitating thoughts - the next day you turn into a complete dumb.
I am tired of it everyday spending hours perfecting my application , whereas the entire process maybe a crapshoot - who knows? I don't want this to bring me down - after investing so much time what if I don't get into the school of my dreams. What if this entire process is a waste? Who will reimburse these lost days of trauma and frustration?

Did I portray myself correctly? Will the adcomm give me a second thought or will he just dump me it into the pile of rejects even without bothering what I went through? I lost my social life, my reading habits, my technical brush-up, my family time... and over that TOEFL. ohh !! When will December arrive? - when will I be done with this process and can sleep peacefully. When will I get those admit calls? When will all this end?

It's more difficult for me as I have been planning for this for such a long time. I want to go to Business School or I would never get that corner office in Manhattan; I would never get to mix with the social elites ;I would never get that window of opportunity. And then I think - what about Bill Gates? Larry Ellison? Dell? They are not MBAs - they didn't need an MBA to be successful - then why do I crave for it?

Lot of gibberish thought for a day. I will close the chapter here. As promised I would put my Berkeley class visit soon. I am thinking to organize a chat session in Nov.1 in my yahoo groups where all we can come together and vent out frustrations. I am sure most of us would have submitted our first round applications and would be gearing up for second round. This chat will be a refreshing break from all this madness.

Book me for an asylum. If nothing happens that is the only place where I can be sane shadowed behind insanity.